Ho Ho HUMBUG!

December 25, 2015 by Dana Andrews in holiday blues

The week between Christmas and New Year is never quiet or mundane...unless you live alone or are spending the holidays without family or loved ones. In this case, it's not really a holiday in your heart.

We all are conditioned to think of the holidays as filled with all good things; just like our stomachs after a hearty Christmas dinner. We envision beautiful snow frosting the landscape and coating Christmas lights, making them look even more magical. We think of all the glorious gifts beneath the largest, fullest tree, fully dressed in lights and ribbons, and adorned with ornaments from years past. Relaxing fireside, hot chocolate in hand, we reminisce years gone by, how the children have grown, and now have babies of their very own. Did I forget to mention the Christmas carols? They play ad nauseum everywhere you go. Such a sweet reminder that we should be feeling happy; joy should be bursting forth from our hearts. Our cups runneth over and we should be thankful for everything we have been given. What about what was never given, or even worse, taken away?

It Rolled In With the Tide...

December 18, 2015 by Dana Andrews

Last week my sweet husband took me on a beach vacation. We left behind the holiday hustle to take in sun, sea and sanity. You'll never guess what rolled in with the tide...

If You Cannot Forgive, How Do You Forget?

December 09, 2015 by Dana Andrews

If you cannot forgive, how do you forget?

In short, I say you don’t.

In my memoir, Room in the Heart, A childhood Undone, A Pact to Love Fulfilled, I discuss this very sensitive and controversial issue for survivors of all types of abuse. From my experience as both a sexual assault nurse and also a victim/survivor of emotional/physical abuse, I firmly believe we have no moral obligation to forgive those who have abused us. The moment they chose to harm us, our accountability for respecting their needs was declared null and void. Void…just like the part of us that used to feel safe from harm. Harm…what they promised us would never happen if we kept SAFE this secret that WE never agreed to keep in the first place.

Baby... Always call me "Baby."

December 07, 2015 by Dana Andrews in Hope

Sometimes from innocent moments come beauty in its rawest form. Sometimes we are looking for nothing, yet see what entices our eyes. And even sometimes, what we see frees us from external world events and externally imposed expectations, and brings us to such a special moment that fills our hearts with joy. It makes time stand till, so we can take it in. Don’t dare to blink! Even though this is just a moment, it can last throughout our lives. I hope it always will.

I awakened this morning with both a smile and a feeling that I hope will never leave me. I remembered how one of our sons and his girlfriend call one another “Baby.” Doesn’t that sound nice? I get it; not yet sounding earth-shaking to you, right? The thought that immediately followed this musing WAS earthshaking to me, and hopefully to you, too.

Who Needs a Nursing or Any Degree?

December 04, 2015 by Dana Andrews

A while back I attended my annual international forensic meeting. It was attended by both women and men who work in this highly specialized area of nursing, and included even sub-specialties within our practice. For all, the crux of the focus was the caring and compassion for our patients and their loved ones.

Throughout this meeting I continued to realize, more and more, that in reality, it is not just nurses who should specialize in caring and compassion for others. We all need to.