Most people own many things, some more than others. As life changes for us, so do our “things.” We collect them, share them, give them away, and hopefully, forever keep the intangible ones! For me, over the years the term “things” has changed in more ways than I can count.

As a young wife and mother of 5 children living in California, “things” mostly referred to our children's toys that were scattered underfoot, a ready promise for some hopefully benign mishap! Chores always involved putting “things” away, including laundry, toys, shoes, homework, and candy, which seemed to disappear faster than greased lightning! When we prepared to move to the East Coast, we told our children we were going to be “pioneers,” and had to pack up only the “things” that we would need once we got there. It’s not a happy thing for children's’ ears when they are told, “No, you cannot bring ALL your Lego and build a bed to sleep on while we wait for the moving van to drive here from California.” It appeared similarly devastating when I had to utter the words, “I know you love our ducks, but they are not allowed on a plane even IF they DO fit in a nice little box!!!"

Interestingly enough, I had to close MY ears after hearing, ad nauseam, “Let’s make sure she forgets to pack the vitamins and toothbrushes!” It is interesting how a child defines the need and want! In my forever sleep-deprived state, I was thrilled when we ALL ended up on the plane, and no child (our most precious “things” by far!) was left behind.

Once on the East Coast, “things” became more significant and more involved. Now facing four distinct seasons meant five pairs of shoes and boots, toys went from little Lego pieces to skateboards and sleds, chores went from gathering eggs to grooming llamas, homework went from spelling tests to research papers, and candy led to an occasional cavity and trips to the dentist!!! The dentist soon recommended an orthodontist…

Diapers and cribs became a thing from our distant past. The thrill of potty training and big-kid beds seemed dull in comparison to passing a driver’s test and buying a first car! The excitement of a play date couldn’t come close to a prom date! Bar and Bat Mitzvahs were such a milestone in our children's’ lives until our first born became engaged to be married!

Throughout our many moves since Sacramento, “things” we cherished were lost, broken, and replaced. Courtesy of packers who “helped us” wrap and pack delicate items (not including the dirty baby diaper they used for padding breakables,) somewhere in a landfill in Pennsylvania lies the little glass Bambi my maternal grandmother bought me as a child in Canada. The tears have long since dried, and a swell of beautiful memories of the circumstances of her giving me this Bambi now have a stronghold in my heart. Sometimes the things we let go of (a nicer way to say “lost”) can leave a wonderful space for more beautiful memories to fill. Opening boxes once they were delivered, proved to be a lesson in things broken and replaced. Softball and soccer trophies don’t look quite as impressive when the heads have been broken off. Interestingly, Robert decided that gluing the heads on backward might make these awards even more appealing! The boys agreed that replacing their trophies would not be as much fun as earning new ones on their new teams in New Jersey.

All the moves and the years in-between have led to lessons that are so much more important than any “things” we could ever possibly cherish! As our children’s childhoods unfolded, “things” that were previously known to us as possessions, were replaced by memories. Events on a seemingly uneventful day left us with memories that continue to bring our hearts such happiness. Nothing could describe the feelings when upon taking Scott to soccer practice we noticed a white object in the middle of our pasture. Upon investigation we realized our black ewe had just given birth to an adorable white lamb, Scott named “Gorgeous.” Of course, our precious lamb is now feeding on hay in sweeter pastures, but the memories surrounding her serendipitous birth continue to bring a smile to us all. The memory of a magical white ***SNOWY*** blanket covering everything in sight remains vivid, while the very first snowball the children froze met its demise when they left the freezer open weeks later! Sacramento summers brought delicious peaches and pears to be picked from our backyard orchard, then canned for year-round enjoyment. The canned fruit and the jars are long-gone, but summer always conjures up the memories from Sacramento. Whether it be a lamb, a snowball or an orchard, the “things” that gave us the memories can never last as long as the memories themselves.

At holiday time, over the past fifteen years, I wrote a holiday letter, which was sent to our family, and friends we gathered with every move! It was such a fun way to keep in touch, while also assimilating the changes in our family from year to year.

Each letter brought comments from those receiving them, suggesting I become a writer in my next life! I was only trying to keep up with making sure my husband and kids had their lunches packed for the NEXT day!!! It was enough of a challenge to find the time to write the letters and address the envelopes! Thankfully, five little mouths can be quieted and most content by licking stamps!

Sixteen years after the first letter was written, with our youngest applying to colleges, and writing essays, I was struck by the thought that my life, through these letters, is MY essay! As each year’s letter is read, a little more of the chapter of my family unfolds. All the letters that were a “thing” to get done in time for the holidays soon became SO MUCH MORE! They serve as reminders and lessons about love, loss, laughter, and hope.

And so, I hope that you, the reader, can put aside your “things,” and take whatever you might like from this blog post and hopefully my book, Room in the Heart. May these words conjure up your old memories, assist you in assimilating your circumstances, and serve to sweeten all the days to follow!

Room in the Heart is available on Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/Room-Heart-Surviving-Childhood-Fulfilling-ebook/dp/B06ZZ8BC4S/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1546792397&sr=8-1&keywords=room+in+the+heart